You Know You’re Getting Old When…

• You know all the answers, but nobody asks you the questions.
• You enjoy hearing about other people’s operations.
• You got cable for the weather channel. Old Folks MTV!
• Your new easy chair has more options than your car.
• Your little black book only contains names ending in M.D.

You Know You’re Getting Old When…

• You give up all your bad habits and you still don’t feel good.
• Your childhood toys are now in a museum.
• You can’t remember the last time you laid on the floor to watch television.
• You confuse having a clear conscience with having a bad memory.
• You frequently find yourself telling people what a loaf of bread USED to cost.

You Know You’re Getting Old When…

• Your ears are hairier than your head.
• You have a party and the neighbors don’t even realize it.
• It takes longer to rest than it did to get tired.
• You talk about “good grass” and you’re referring to someone’s lawn.
• The end of your tie doesn’t come anywhere near the top of your pants.

You Know You’re Getting Old When…

• Your ears are hairier than your head.
• You have a party and the neighbors don’t even realize it.
• It takes longer to rest than it did to get tired.
• You talk about “good grass” and you’re referring to someone’s lawn.
• The end of your tie doesn’t come anywhere near the top of your pants.

You Know You’re Getting Old When…

• You wonder how you could be over the hill when you don’t remember being on top of it.
• Getting lucky means you find your car in the parking lot.
• The little gray-haired lady you help across the street is your wife.
• Your idea of weight lifting is standing up.
• Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can’t remember them either.